My Favorite Quotes from The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy (Movie)

Here's the original movie trailer and my favorite quotes from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005 movie):



Ghostly Image: It is most gratifying that your enthusiasm for our planet continues unabated. As a token of our appreciation, we hope you will enjoy the two thermonuclear missiles we've just sent to converge with your craft. To ensure ongoing quality of service, your death may be monitored for training purposes. Thank you.

The Book: It's an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, Man had always assumed that he was the most intelligent species occupying the planet, instead of the *third* most intelligent. The second most intelligent creatures were of course dolphins who, curiously enough, had long known of the impending destruction of the planet earth. They had made many attempts to alert mankind to the danger, but most of their communications were misinterpreted as amusing attempts to punch footballs or whistle for titbits. So they eventually decided they would leave earth by their own means. The last ever dolphin message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to do a double backward somersault through a hoop while whistling the star-spangled banner, but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the fish.

Here's a link to YouTube video of this quote and the song "So Long and Thanks for All the Fish." I dare you not to get it stuck in your head.

Marvin: I've been talking to the main computer.
Arthur: And?
Marvin: It hates me.

The Book: Vogons. They are one of the most unpleasant races in the galaxy. Not actually evil, but bad-tempered, bureaucratic, officious, and callous. They wouldn't even lift a finger to save their own grandmothers from the ravenous Bug-Blatter Beast of Traal without orders signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, lost, found, queried, subjected to public inquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat for three months and recycled as firelighter. On no account should you allow a Vogon to read poetry to you.

Ah, Vogons. I would link a video, but I haven't found one with decent resolution. Watch the movie if you enjoy British humor, heavy sarcasm, word play, imagination, and general awesomeness.

Banekus = Haikus by Bane

Disclaimer: this post is not IH-related. Spouse and I are nerds. We are especially fond of Christopher Nolan's Batman adaptations, the most recent of which is The Dark Knight Rises. While I was procrastinating the actual "sit down and write" part of being an aspiring novelist, I realized something weird:

Lots of Bane's lines in the movie fit very nicely in Haiku format.

Photo courtesy of Time Warner and Entertainment Weekly

Check it out...

They were mistaken
You fight like a younger man
With nothing held back

(That one is from the spouse.)


Haikus (American-style ones, anyways) follow the 5 syllable-7 syllable-5 syllable, three-line format.

Here's some more, while I was trying to "get in the head" of the character Bane.

It was a mistake
To make me your enemy
You will feel your death

They are my servants
I am the League of Shadows
Join me and serve me

Do you feel in charge?
You will watch your city burn
I have broken you

I always feel it
Pain lets you know you are alive
You can't hear me scream

I tried to save her
Innocence did not belong
Escape from the pit

They breed corruption
Someday they will understand
Death before rebirth

And just to round it out, here's one for Batman:

Rise and face your fear
Life is not just beating death
Climb without the rope

Hope you like them! I have some more unfinished ones, but I am keeping them to myself.

The Banekus also work if you mix and match, i.e.:

I have broken you
I am the League of Shadows
Death before rebirth

Let's see what you can come up with.